Often a person suffers from guilt after losing a relative

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- Failure to save relatives after doing everything and the person falls into deep grief

"I killed my father," he said, and burst into tears. Yet he had just entered the consulting room!

"Son, first sit down, be a little healthy, then talk calmly," I said softly. He started crying even while sitting. Now without saying anything I let her cry.

'I wish I hadn't forced my dad to get vaccinated, he would be alive today. I killed him, punish me! ' It started to fill up again. After a few moments he recovered. 'Dad didn't want to be vaccinated at all. Having said that I need a vaccine wherever I go out but I pushed and vaccinated both mom and dad. On the third day after the vaccination, he developed a fever. He began to have difficulty breathing and had to be hospitalized with a diagnosis of corona. In a week ... 'Before he could finish the sentence, his eyes filled up again!

"Mom even took the vaccine, didn't she ?!" I said that the guilt can only be handled if it is understood that the vaccine is not responsible for the death of the father. But he stared out the window at the sky without responding!

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In my long career as a psychiatrist, I have always found that the feeling of guilt or guilt hurts a person as much as any other negative emotion. Feelings of fear, anger, sadness, failure, etc. are passed on to others sooner or later, while the guilt is more or less ingrained in the person.

The feelings of guilt are not as much supported as other negative emotions. Because in other emotions the fight is with external factors, while in guilt the person is fighting with himself. This is the mood of many people who have lost loved ones in the epidemic. Many people are suffering from their thoughts and the guilt caused by it after the plague hit their relatives.

'I wish I could have started treatment earlier', 'I would have been taken to a private hospital', 'I would have been shifted to a bigger hospital in the city', 'I could have arranged for the necessary medicines, oxygen or a bed', 'I would have taken the necessary precautions',' I would have taken the vaccine '- etc. Many thoughts revolve in the mind after losing relatives. In many cases, even friends and relatives, knowingly or unknowingly, increase their feelings of guilt by giving advice. Many of them are such that if you don't have them, it will create guilt in you! Missing at the time of taking responsibility and then present saying 'you should do this'!

Just as people who recover from a corona are more likely to have a blood clot, they are also more likely to suffer from guilt after losing a relative in the corona. Even after doing everything, the failure to save the relative suffers and the person falls into deep grief. Many find their lives meaningless, sometimes even suicidal thoughts.

This guilt is not limited to families who have lost loved ones, many doctors-nurses-other health workers who are treating them are also victims! Do you remember the suicide of a doctor from Delhi who was on duty in Kovid ICU ?! In such circumstances, many family members ask me the question, if a person who feels guilt has done everything he can, then why is he in such a mood ?! Then I always explain that it is not necessary to feel guilty or do anything wrong to feel the feelings of 'guilt'! Bus; Your mind should experience feelings of guilt, wrong or not doing enough! Even so, owning one is still beyond the reach of the average person.

Many criminals will be such that no matter how horrible or violent the crime, even if they do not feel guilty, the habitual criminals are members of this class. On the contrary, many individuals suffer from guilt by nature. Not only is it their mental strength to commit a big crime but they cannot forgive themselves even for a small mistake and keep feeling the guilt of committing the crime.

Regardless of the behavior, many sensitive individuals have feelings of guilt just by holding on to the thoughts going through their minds. Often, even those who seem to be concerned explain that even though he has not done anything wrong, he still suffers by considering it as a crime in his eyes!

Fear and guilt are both deeply rooted in these feelings. It is difficult to remedy unless a person opens his mind with complete transparency. In most cases the person is reluctant to show full transparency in this regard because they are afraid of being mentally 'judged' - 'What will the other person think of me ?!' And as it happens, the other person starts giving advice without even listening to him.

In addition, gilt or fear is pushed deeper into the mind! The best option in these circumstances is to write a diary, let alone your feelings. If you want, read the diary to your therapist, if you don't want to save it or tear it after writing. A confection box in a corner of the church is also a way to get rid of guilt.

All I have to say to families, doctors or other health workers who feel guilty about not being able to save their loved ones in Kovid is not to make the mistake of thinking of oneself as God. Man must leave the result to fate after doing his best work. Even Lord Krishna, after doing his best, had to leave the result to war, remember ?!

Full break:

Many families continue to sneer at the patients of depression that there is happiness all around, then what is the cause of depression ?! These people should ask their loved ones who have become corona, why is it difficult to breathe after there is air all around ?!